Jillian David -- Paranormal romance, adventure and suspense. Just what the doctor ordered…
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New series -- Hell's Valley: chilly Wyoming nights, hot ranchers, psychic powers, and an emerging evil force that wants to destroy them all.

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Writer, heal thyself!

9/8/2015

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            As a newcomer to writing and publishing, there have been the typical highs and lows that authors often experience. No amount of pep talks, trolling newbie author boards, or self-affirmations helps those periods of doubt. You know the times: queries sent into the great black void, the release of the first book to…cheers? crickets?, the awesome reviews, and the reviews where no feelings are spared. For every fist-pump milestone, there were corresponding fears and doubts. Too many highs and lows. Too much doubt. So how could I fix this problem?

            A side note: As a physician, this job is heavily invested in fixing things. Solving problems is what I do in my day job, and I’m pretty good at it. I also give lots of advice to go along with the fixing of patients’ problems.

            However, this writer/doctor is great at dishing out advice…but not so great at taking it. But enough already. Enough with second-guessing and fear of rejection. Enough! I’m no expert on writing and publishing, but I’m can sure give out medical advice. Perhaps this doctor could help herself? Time to take some of my own medicine – writing style!

#1) Breathe.

            Confession time. I deliver babies, so I often tell women to breathe. (Sometimes also husbands.) At 9 centimeters dilated, women might ignore this advice and hurl objects, hurl obscenities, or simply hurl. But for the mothers-to-be who take this simple advice to heart and try to take slow, deep breaths, their anxiety and pain improves, the pelvis relaxes, and that baby descends through the pelvis faster. (By the way, if you tell a fully dilated woman she has “discomfort”, it is likely that she will demonstrate in an easy-to-undestand manner the difference between “discomfort” and “pain”.)

           Writers get good and bad reviews. The first time I read through all of the reviews, panic and feelings of worthlessness swamped me. Why? Because I fixated on only the negative reviews (discomfort) rather than the big picture of a published book that quite a few people enjoy (cute baby). Once I shut up, listened to myself and took some deep breaths, the panic faded away and I could do something more productive, like edit the next book!

#2) Exercise every day.

            What the heck? Dr. Jill’s lost her mind. What does exercise have to do with writing?  
            How about everything? 

            Writers, how many times have you sat in that ergonomically inappropriate chair for hours on end, writing/editing/outlining? You know the seat. It’s the couch or the floor or the super comfy La-Z-Boy recliner. Anything but the chair in front of your computer desk. Bet when you get up from the writing location, you made old-lady noises. Maybe joints popped and crackled like a bowl of Rice Krispies. So, to save your hips, knees, shoulders and back, walk 5 minutes for every hour in the writing chair.

            But how does walking relate to writing advice? Walking, even for a short period of time, has been documented to produce stress-busting endorphins, improve attention and creativity, and elevate mood and self-esteem. Health-wise, walking also helps to reduce pain (30 minutes of walking is demonstrated to be superior to certain pain meds when it comes to back pain), improve heart health, and reduce deep venous thrombosis (DVT) risk. So, when the writing gets me stressed, my first-line treatment is to go for a walk.

#3) Take this pill once daily. Do not skip a dose.

            Same premise goes for writing. Write daily, even if it’s only for a few minutes. I used to worry about whether I could produce decent prose or come up with good ideas and get them on paper in a coherent manner. Writing daily, even if it’s not the most fabulous work, is fine. Because when you prospect for gold, not every pan has a nugget. And that’s okay. Keep swirling the sand, something good will eventually appear.

#4) Give it time. Things will improve.

            I often give this advice to patients. If a patient has pneumonia, and we’ve started treatment, I explain: You’re going to feel rough, but medication, rest, and hydration will help. Even though it might take up to two months to recover completely, you will improve slowly but surely over that time.

            Of course, I hate this advice when I have to take it. But with respect to the writing process and writing career, “giving it time” doesn’t come naturally. However, in frustrating times of writing and publishing, when things get stressful, it’s useful to take a step beck and yes, give it time.

#5) Take little steps. You’ll get there.

            Again, I can dish it out, but boy do I hate to take this piece of advice. I’m more of a “one giant step” kind of gal, but when it comes to the long journey of writing, the likelihood of meeting every goal in one fell swoop is slim to none. There are so many things to do. Get social media presence set up, send out queries, market before and after each book’s release, plan for future series, and – oh, yeah – write more books!

            So much to do. Totally overwhelmed.



            Therefore, one last piece of advice (to me): “When eating an elephant, take it one bite at a time.” -- Creighton Abrams, Jr., US Army general in the Vietnam War. (Disclaimer: I do not advocate eating an actual elephant. To be honest, I am a vegetarian and would not eat any animal.)

            To readers, writers, and, well, anyone: If this little window into my world of doubt and denial helps you avoid the same frustrations, then more’s the better. Please let me know if this post helps, and I’ll be happy to send you my bill. (Screw insurance companies and medicare. I will accept payment in the form of chocolate!)

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What does Friday feel like?

9/4/2015

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Before I launch into a new list, let me explain why this post. I haven’t had real Fridays in over ten years. That’s when I started practicing medicine, delivering babies, admitting patients, and so on. The work model meant that if my patients needed me, I would come in for them. That model is great. But I’ve skirted burnout (ok, totally burnt to a crisp 5 years ago, no question) the entire time, which isn’t conducive to career longevity, to say nothing of happiness. I haven't said "TGIF" for over ten years. Now that's just plain wrong.

With some trepidation, I joined a medical group where my duties are the same as before. Only now, when I’m on call, I manage everything – all group deliveries, admissions, nursing home calls and the like. So, insanely busy but also super fulfilling.

But when I’m off? Not on call but still working in the office? Going home after work? Off? What’s that???

Please walk with me through my first "normal joe" Friday in a long time. It was a Friday where I finished up in the office, went home, and turned off the phone. Wow. I can't stop smiling.

#10) There is a sensation in my chest, almost like I’ve held my breath for too long and finally can breathe again. Instead of cringing if my phone rings, I know it’s something not-work, like a friend, or my parents, or hubby.

#9) I made plans to do nothing on Saturday. And best of all, I’ll be able to keep those plans.

#8) I made plans to do something on Sunday. And best of all, I’ll be able to keep those plans.

#7) Hubby and I are going to go out to eat tomorrow evening. At a restaurant. And I’m not tense. In fact, I might leave the phone at home, and believe doing so will improve the experience.

#6) Oh dear lordie, we can go out to a movie and not worry that I’ll have to leave. You guys don’t understand. Hubs and I haven’t been to an honest-to-pete movie in a movie place with oily awesome popcorn and watery soda in years and years. Frustration with half-watched new releases made me give up.

#5) I might cook something. Because I won’t have to leave suddenly and then worry that the food is ruined or the house will burn down.

#4) It’s possible to touch up those roots. (Uh, not that I have gray hair or anything. Of course not.) There will be no fear of rinsing prematurely to run out the door.

#3) Before bed I used to lay out socks, then on top of that pants, then undies, then a shirt, then a bra. Exactly in that order. Because that’s the order I crammed them on at 2am as I frantically tried to get to some emergency. I don’t mind setting them out. I don’t even mind the emergencies. But not every night.

#2) If I want to sleep in, it’s pretty much a lock that the hospital will not call me with critical labs at 7:05 a.m.. Mostly because my phone will be off. And look ma! -- no guilt.

#1) Best reason of all. More time to write without distraction, without loss of focus and interruptions. I don’t have to go from plotting or editing to calculating gentamycin doses and worrying about someone’s breathing then going back to writing. Now, that’s something fabulous. Wow.

Hey, you out there. Yeah, you. TGIF! (And I mean it.)

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    Jillian David

    Author, daydreamer, and practitioner of trying very hard to fix whatever's wrong with folks or at least duct tape them together

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